13.2.09

An All New Season...

Standby for an All New Season of .... Boned n Stoned !!!

Cumming to a blog near you this Spring !!

Its gonna get sleazier... its gonna get sexier... its gonna get dirty...

...it might even get messy :p

All new episodes and tales of me... your truly... Boned n Stoned... pigboy... cumslut... hor... cummyholefucker.... slut for sluts... call me what u like...

Sticks n Stones may break my bones, but Dick will never hurt me :)

I think i should Copyright this shit

So guys... ive been busy busy busy as fuck lately....

The broship with the fukbud is over... history... he was fuckin insane... i couldnt deal with it... it was like this dramatic climax to a season ender on HBO...

so now... i need time to chillax
gotta take a Vaycay...
regroup the writers and actors for the next season of BonednStoned....

I always tend to curb down my pigginess in the winter... most of us do up here... in the great white fucking north... Geezus fuck i need to move to California or something !!

...but the inner pig cums back to life once the trees start budding...the dirty icebergs of ice melt off the sidewalk... and my balls start to hang lower cause the temperature starts rising and they dont scrunch the fuck up into my liver for warmth !!!
LOL

...but who says im not having fun...
oh jeez fuck...
i got 2 hot fuckdates to blog about...
whadya think... i dont have any new material for u... please

its not like i go out to have sex just to blog about it... I just love going out and having sex, cause i like sticking my dick into a hot hole all the fucking time... its just a matter of finding quality ass and quality dick...
quantity's never been my thing...
well...im lying there..
quantity can be fun if it happens...
and sometimes it can make up for quality...
but im all about the quality :))

fuck... this is good quality weed :P its not how much u smoke... but the luv n attention it gets when it buds :))

now....b4 we get back to our program.... here's just a few msgs from our sponsor....









ok.... thats enuf !!
i hate long commercial breaks....

so? where was i ....
oh yeah... breeding ass...

i should seriously blog this shit the day after.... u lose site of the little details....

So the last day i see the "bro"friend... im dropping off some cash at his place... he was squealing for days about this cash i owed him... it was like $20 bucks !!! ...like dude... seriuously... he just wanted me to drop it off and fuck him...and i just dont wanna deal with the fucker anymore... so i go up the elevator...drop the bill outside in the hall and txt him to get it....

the elevator door opens and this guy walks out... he looked kinda familiar...and i just hung back to make sure he doesnt swipe the cash.... he just walks up to brofriends door, turns the handle and walks in...and im like "ok" ?!?! .... his head pops out, he sees the cash... and sees me... but by this time i missed the elevator, so im stuck waiting for another one... so he runs up to me in these nasty plaid clothes that just scream "im dirty white trash"...and tries to hug n kiss me... and im like "ewww" and push him off me....

so ex bro-friend looks at me and he's like "its not what u think, he's a friend of mine".... and im like "i dont give a fuck... I got a piece of ass i need to get to tonite... and as for ur buddy... i bred that slutty bitch long ago" .... The elevator door opens and he sulks back to his little hovel of an apartment... Fuck... Good Riddance !!!

Im not the type of guy u wanna fuck with :))
I can play mr nice pig...
i can be mr cute pig....
i can be mr slutty cumslut pig...
tick me off...
and ill tear ur fucking ass apart bitch !!!!

LOLOL

....so i pop over to this slutty french cumdumps place... only fucked the guy once b4... he had just gotten home from work... hadnt been laid in a while....and was craving some hard thick dick... he lives on the groudfloor of this highrise in a smutty part of town... its a perfect cumdump pad... leave the door open... lots of traffic... easy for guy to cum n go and breed ur hole :p

so i get in the door... we sit down and catch up on shit... i roll a J... he did a G or some T... fuck i dunno what... i dont pay attention to all that shit guys do... im just a simple toker... thats all dude.... dont take me much to unwind... i dont need any fucking horse tranqualizer to make me relax.... i dont know how guys smoke kitchen bathroom Ajax/Comet and enjoy it ?!?!

he pops on a porn... it was something Treasure Island... but something i hadnt seen b4.... so my eyes r glued to the screen... the weed is chillin me out...and my dick is stiffening in my hand... i get fukbud on his knees... wrap my hands around his head and start deep fucking his throat... nuthin feels better than a slut's wide open mouth wrapped around my fat dick...

we move the party over to the bedroom... he switches the porn over to his tv in there...and back we go to some deep throating... he's got a pretty nice impressive dick too... to i get under him and start 69'ing him... my fingers are playing with his ass and im spitting gobs of spit all over his hole and massaging it in his ass... he's moaning like a bitch in heat... his ass is fucking craving dick... so i flip him on all 4's and start going down on his hole ... im an insatiable rimmer.. i luv rimming and eating out a hot hole... smooth hole... hairy hole... ill nibble... ill bite... ill blow on it softly... spit and flicker my tongue on it lightly... rub my hairy chin all over it hard... make u moan and spit lube it up good b4 i slide my dick inside.... oh yeah... i luv to fuckin eat out a nice hot ass :))

once he's nice n ready and begging for my dick... i find some Gun Oil on his bedside table... pour it all over my cock and his hole... throw the poppers over to his face... aim my dick and start slapping his hole with it... he's sniffing away like crazy cause i can tell he's tight...but he knows he wont be by the time im thru :p he's still doggie and i straddle his ass and slide my dick inside... his hole just swallowed it hole... i barely had to push n shove.... but once i get in balls deep his ass twitches and clamps down on my dick... he wasnt gonna let go for the life of it... his hole wanted that seed... so i had to oblige... i just started pummeling his ass... it was soooo tight i had to loosen it up... he'd clamp and unclamp his ass which just made me wanna fuck him harder and deeper... i was feeling soo fucking high from the grass... and i was luvin taking my time with his ass... i pull my dick outta his hole... walk around and make him suck his hole off my dick... he has this padded headboard so i could lean on it and skull fuck his face...

flip him onto his back... pull a leg onto my shoulder, spit on his hole....and jab my dick back in his hole... it felt soo warm n squishy... i was fucking luving it... i hadnt cum yet... but it felt like he had 2 loads up there... i dunno if it was my pre-cum or just cause he had showered 30 mins earlier... but warm, wet, squishy hole is awesome... we'd flip n fuck in every position... on the side spooning... pinned underneath me, biting his shoulders and neck while i used my hands to cover his mouth... flip on my back and thrusts my hips up while he rides me... back to doggie... after awhile i could tell his hole couldnt handle much anymore... so i pull out and jerk off my cock... he's begging for my load up his ass... and we're just talking like dirty pigs back n forth... once i feel my balls boil, i lift his legs up... point at his ass and ram it in violently.... he's squeeling in pain and i just start unloading a huge fucking load in his ass... he's trying to push me out... but im pinning his down with my hands and slam fuck my load in deep....just a good 10-12 thrusts and his ass clenched down and pushed my dick out.. LOL

Mission Accomplished....
Payload Delivered....
Return to Base...
Congratulations Lieutenent...

LOL....

i think i collapsed on top of him.... we were both fucking exhausted and i gotta say i enjoy a good workout... we moved back to his couch and chilled out... he orders some takeout...and i just go back to finishing my joint... then he starts blabbing and talking about his work and his business.... blah blah blah blah blah... and he wouldnt shut the fuck up...

he reminds me of the ex brofriend... he's a bit more accomplished... but fuk... its the same chatty insecure personality.... the similarities were uncanny... so im freaking out beneath my skin.... his take out arrives and im getting dressed... he wants me to stay n chat some more... so i hang around a bit longer... but i had to wake up early n work... and so did he... so i got outta there by midnite... he's a pig in bed i gotta admit... and i nice guy... but fuck... he's got serious personality issues...

so.... a cpl nites b4 that... me and this dude had been chatting online about hooking up for awhile... another brofriend of mine and him had been partying the nite b4.... apparently i had cum highly recommended, so we made plans and hook up.... he lives in this posh little condo downtown... it was right across the street from a college ive take some theatrical studies at... he opens the door... and he's this hot lookin guy... a bit on the skinny side for me... like anorexic skinny... but fuck... he's cute, ill fuck him :))

we start smooching and rubbing dicks in the doorway and we stumble into the bedroom... he starts doing a hit of G...so i take it upon myself to light a J... and im thinking to myself... Why do all these fucking bottoms need drugs to get fucked ??!?!?!

im a huge bottom cumslut... i dont need anything to get fucked... smoking some pot makes it feel sooo much different, but either your relaxed and like taking dick.. or your just a tight ass :P
lol

so me n fukstud start rolling around in bed... he's got some house n techno music playing so it feels like ur at the tubs or some pornshoot filming.... we're dick sucking... he had a nice fat dick, which id luv to take up my ass once its healed good... (which by the way... is cumming along nicely according to the doc... ill be back in action shortly :))

one thing about this guy i luved the most was his ass... he had this perfectly shaped butt.... lightly hairy....unshaven.... sweaty... i went to fucking town eating his hole... i dunno how long i was at it... coulda been 10 mins or 60... we were both high and his hole was my dinner... i dont think anyone could ever claim im a shitty ass eater... i excel in all tasks... when i wanna eat hole, ill eat it like there's no tomorrow... when i wanna inhale a fat dick i like... consider ur dick milked dry...
...so once i get fukstuds hole nice n lubed up, i line my dick up and work it in... he's a tight slut... once im inside he swallows it hole... but after a few minutes of fucking he's pushing me out and hitting the tina pipe and poppers.... fuck... i thought he was loose enuf, but he was hurtin !!
LOLOL

we fucked on n off for an hour or two... id lick his hole between fuckings and get him to suck my dick clean... it was a hot pig session... but his hole was hurtin, so i had to jerk n cum outside.... the first spurt or two landed on his hole and then i just pushed my dickhead inside... he screamed loud, but i held him down and spurt a cpl more times in his ass... i think he felt every spasm in his ass....i filled his ass with a huge load and left my dick up inside him for a cpl mins while i kissed and swapped spit with him... my dick plops outta his hole and he fingers his ass and scoops up some cum.... he feeds it to me and im in pig heaven... so i finger more cum outta his ass and shove my fingers in his mouth... he's lapping away at the cum like a fiend...fuck... i luv felching and snowballing... guys who r into get extra star ratings in my books....

we talked about hooking up again and mabey having a little party... he's a hot fucking slut...but he aint trash... good job... nice condo... and he just likes his dick and ass... just like me :)) fuck.. finally a pig i can relate too !!!

so yes boys, pigs, guys n fuglies... Get ready...

Its an all new season... of Boned n Stoned... Cumming to a blog near U this Spring....

im off to watch this new show i discovered on HBO

Flight of the Concords... its fucking amazing... id never heard of it b4... and dude... U gotta watch it stoned !!!!

ok... let me finish off with some fresh poetry i just wrote today... stoned as fuck... i do my best work :)


Im a pig who seeds n breeds ...
all the hole the eye can see...

im a slut who fucks n sucks...
ill take ur cum right up my butt....

im a guy who tokes n strokes...
yo dude, cum here...
& poke my throat !

im a boy who luvs his dick....
just spit on it & take it bitch :))


3 comments:

GBF said...

Hot post! Love hearing about you getting high and horny. Same here. Flight of the Concords, hilarious. The "too many dicks on the dance floor" number at the beginning was tres gay/friendly.
Looking forward to the next season of your posts.
G

Rex said...

awesome

Anonymous said...

Buenas noches

It is my first time here. I just wanted to say hi!